Christianity is not about sin.
it is not about trying to make ourselves better and working as hard as we can to earn our salvation.
It is about Jesus,
and what God did through him,
in his life,
death,
ressurection
and assension.
It is about the freedom
from worry,
anxiety,
sin,
mistakes,
and regrets we have and have made and will make, because of our wonderful savior.
If we are not free,
If we do not have:
joy,
peace,
grace,
hope
and most of all
love;
but instead
frustration,
depression,
anxiety,
dispare
and fear
based on our faith,
we have bad theology and should never want to speak or spread that gospel to anyone.
I tried for so long to earn my salvation
I tried so long to make myself better
but my focus was not on Christ
My focus was to move up the corporate latter of the church.
My focus was to make others
like me,
love me,
and look at me.
I would preach love, but not feel loved
I would preach grace, but hide my sin
I would preach hope, but not know it
I would preach peace, but never have it.
I would preach faith, but would have immense doubt.
I would preach joy, but would feel competley depressed.
In the words of Derek Webb
"The Gospel has not failed us, We just fail to believe it."
You are loved Imperfect, sinful, vulgar, wrong, and twisted you may be But You are loved.
You are forgiven,
You have hope to be made right,
You have hope in the grace and love of God through Christ.
It is not about what you do, it is about what He has already done.
Be real!
Be who you are!
Bring that to church.
Bring that to Jesus.
Take off the mask of "i have it all together"
Take off the mask of "i can do it on my own"
Because you don't, and you can't.
Quit Judging other people And realize,
if you are a Christian, that you are in the same boat as those who are not.
And if you are not a Christian,
that hope, love, joy, peace, and grace, are yours for the taking.
We have a mighty big and Glorious savior.
but we only will realize it if we understand
our mighty big and vulgar sin.
I am an adulterer, i judge others, i am vain, i murder others with my thoughts, i am impatient, i use people to get what i want, i minipulate, I smoke cigarettes because it is a crutch, i get drunk to forget about things and try and have a good time. I pop pills to make me feel ok. I lust after girls becuase i don't trust that God will provide. I waste money on myself to make me look like i have it all together even though my finaces are a wreck. I say that i am generous, but most of my money goes to either filling a void in my heart, giving me security, or filling my stomach. I hold grudges. If someone hurts me, even though outwardly i say i forgive them, i really want them to hurt as bad as i do which causes bitterness. I am strait, I do cancer research, i love other people. i am a people pleaser, i am a guitar player, i am a writer, i am a poet, i am a skiier, I am a fast driver, I am a lover and a frigher, I am an arminienist, i am non-denominational, i am a reader, i am an extrovert, i am a son, a brother, a cousin, a nephew, a data manager, a soccer player and on and on and on.
The most important though,
and the only ture identity i can seek,
is that i am loved, deeply loved, by Jesus Christ,
who is my savior,
my redeemer,
and my God.
"Salvation is found in no one else, for there is no other name, under heaven, given to men, by which we must be saved." - Acts 4:12
Be who you are, Seek the Lord, and let him change you.
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Friday, March 5, 2010
Asking why
I think sometimes it helps to know the reason why. When i started working my first job was at Papa's Pizza in Bolingbrook, Illinois. It was a few blocks from where I lived and I had wanted to work there since I was a little boy. I remember shortly after getting hired the owners wife, who was really like the manager would walk around and tell me all these things that was part of my job. One of the first things she said was "if i tell you something, always ask me why?" I said "ok" and she yelled at me and told me that i needed to ask her why i should always ask her why. Fair enough, so I asked her "Why?" and she responded, "because if you ask me why, you won't forget the reason you are doing something."
I thought that was really good logic. Always ask why? I think the truth is, it doesn't make things easier to do or deal with, but it shed light on the understanding so you have your reason. I think everyone has heard the story of the family who for generations when ever they cooked a ham, would cut off both ends before they cooked it. At one point the daughter walks up to the mother and says, mom why do we cut off the ends and throw them away. The mom, responds, that it was how her mother always cooked a ham, and the daughter goes up to her grandma and says, grandma, why does our family always cut the ends off the ham and throw them away before we cook the ham. The grandmother responds, well because thats how my mom always cooked it. The daughter finally goes up to her great grandmother and says, "Grandma, i don't understand, my mom, grandma and you have always cut the ends off the ham before we cooked. Why do we do this?" the great grandmother looks at the daughter and responds, "honey, i have no idea why your mother and her mother do that. The only reason i did it was because i didn't have a pan big enough to fit the whole ham."
How many of us do this with our feelings. When something happens we feel a certain way. but we never ask why. We never seek to find the truth behind why we feel the way we do in certain situations. I was recently talking with a friend, she is dating a guy that has two kids. One of the kids is 12 and the other 14. She told me that it is really interesting to see how the kids interact with their dad. One of the sons always has really dry hands, and is really independent. So she was shocked that every night, he would go up to the dad and ask the dad to rub lotion on his hands. It didn't make sense to her. I talked with her more and found out that the kids come from a divorced family. Turbulance right? Anyways, i thought back to when i was younger. I always had a great relationship with my dad, he was my stability in life. My dad always showed me affection and was there for me. We got along really easily so it was easy for me to hug him and accept a kiss on my cheek, even to this day, i am a grown man, and there is still that some comfort i felt when i was a little boy when my dad hugs me, and gives me a kiss on the cheek.
My brother and my dad on the other had had a very hard relationship growing up. My parents devorced when he was nine, and i was 8. He lived with my dad, but he and my brother just never got along. My brother was pretty introverted. The complete oposite of my dad. And he and my dad also had firey temerments. They consistantly butted heads. The strange part was that even through junior high, my brother would ask my dad to come and tuck him in at night and stay with him in his room till he went asleep. I think in both of these circumstances, its easy to see this and not ask why. I think it is easy for my brother to not know why he needed my dad there to do that, or for the kid to not know why he needs that comfort. Its easy for me to just feel anxiety and not understand why i feel that way. And then we all end up labling people because no one took the time to ask anyone why. Not that knowing why will immediatly change the habit or the feelings, but it allows us to understand and respond better.
For me, there is this underlying fear of being left. because when i was young, it what i knew about love, people would leave. They would hurt each other yell, scream, throw things, and then leave, with out certain return. My brother, he was afraid of my dad not loving him. so knowing my dad wasnt going to leave made him know he was loved. We might not ever understand these things or talk about these things, and then as we get older, we form habits based on the our experiances as children. I use to think it was annoying to hear people talk like this, but the more i think about, the more i realize how much truth there is to it. Think of how many turbulant relationships there are that children grow up with. Think about the number of people that don't marry anymore compared to earlier generations. Think about the divorce rate and how it has sky rocketed. Its because Love, what we see of it, and hear of it in real life, is turbulant, so it scares us. We don't know love with out fighting. We don't see love with out frustration and pain, and hurting, and in a lot of cases, about 50%, abandonment. If we grow up seeing this, if we grow up knowing this, why would anyone want to find what we know of as "love"?
We have been trained by everyone, that fighting is normal. That yelling is just part of the relationship, that heartbreak and suffering, and pain, its all inclusive in love. And if we experiance anything to the contrary, we don't trust it. It scares us, because we are addicted to the abuse. Good cause for anxiety, i think so. So how do we change this? We ask why? and we realize that we don't want people to go through what we went through. We show ourselves, that if by chance we are lucky enough and blessed enough to have children, we teach them diffrent from what we have known, and learn to seperate the "love" we grow up with, the love I grew up with, from the love that is true,
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.
True love, real love, never fails.
I thought that was really good logic. Always ask why? I think the truth is, it doesn't make things easier to do or deal with, but it shed light on the understanding so you have your reason. I think everyone has heard the story of the family who for generations when ever they cooked a ham, would cut off both ends before they cooked it. At one point the daughter walks up to the mother and says, mom why do we cut off the ends and throw them away. The mom, responds, that it was how her mother always cooked a ham, and the daughter goes up to her grandma and says, grandma, why does our family always cut the ends off the ham and throw them away before we cook the ham. The grandmother responds, well because thats how my mom always cooked it. The daughter finally goes up to her great grandmother and says, "Grandma, i don't understand, my mom, grandma and you have always cut the ends off the ham before we cooked. Why do we do this?" the great grandmother looks at the daughter and responds, "honey, i have no idea why your mother and her mother do that. The only reason i did it was because i didn't have a pan big enough to fit the whole ham."
How many of us do this with our feelings. When something happens we feel a certain way. but we never ask why. We never seek to find the truth behind why we feel the way we do in certain situations. I was recently talking with a friend, she is dating a guy that has two kids. One of the kids is 12 and the other 14. She told me that it is really interesting to see how the kids interact with their dad. One of the sons always has really dry hands, and is really independent. So she was shocked that every night, he would go up to the dad and ask the dad to rub lotion on his hands. It didn't make sense to her. I talked with her more and found out that the kids come from a divorced family. Turbulance right? Anyways, i thought back to when i was younger. I always had a great relationship with my dad, he was my stability in life. My dad always showed me affection and was there for me. We got along really easily so it was easy for me to hug him and accept a kiss on my cheek, even to this day, i am a grown man, and there is still that some comfort i felt when i was a little boy when my dad hugs me, and gives me a kiss on the cheek.
My brother and my dad on the other had had a very hard relationship growing up. My parents devorced when he was nine, and i was 8. He lived with my dad, but he and my brother just never got along. My brother was pretty introverted. The complete oposite of my dad. And he and my dad also had firey temerments. They consistantly butted heads. The strange part was that even through junior high, my brother would ask my dad to come and tuck him in at night and stay with him in his room till he went asleep. I think in both of these circumstances, its easy to see this and not ask why. I think it is easy for my brother to not know why he needed my dad there to do that, or for the kid to not know why he needs that comfort. Its easy for me to just feel anxiety and not understand why i feel that way. And then we all end up labling people because no one took the time to ask anyone why. Not that knowing why will immediatly change the habit or the feelings, but it allows us to understand and respond better.
For me, there is this underlying fear of being left. because when i was young, it what i knew about love, people would leave. They would hurt each other yell, scream, throw things, and then leave, with out certain return. My brother, he was afraid of my dad not loving him. so knowing my dad wasnt going to leave made him know he was loved. We might not ever understand these things or talk about these things, and then as we get older, we form habits based on the our experiances as children. I use to think it was annoying to hear people talk like this, but the more i think about, the more i realize how much truth there is to it. Think of how many turbulant relationships there are that children grow up with. Think about the number of people that don't marry anymore compared to earlier generations. Think about the divorce rate and how it has sky rocketed. Its because Love, what we see of it, and hear of it in real life, is turbulant, so it scares us. We don't know love with out fighting. We don't see love with out frustration and pain, and hurting, and in a lot of cases, about 50%, abandonment. If we grow up seeing this, if we grow up knowing this, why would anyone want to find what we know of as "love"?
We have been trained by everyone, that fighting is normal. That yelling is just part of the relationship, that heartbreak and suffering, and pain, its all inclusive in love. And if we experiance anything to the contrary, we don't trust it. It scares us, because we are addicted to the abuse. Good cause for anxiety, i think so. So how do we change this? We ask why? and we realize that we don't want people to go through what we went through. We show ourselves, that if by chance we are lucky enough and blessed enough to have children, we teach them diffrent from what we have known, and learn to seperate the "love" we grow up with, the love I grew up with, from the love that is true,
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.
True love, real love, never fails.
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